Bipolar is a new thing for me. Diagnosed in my 30s after a life shattering few years. Respectable, educated, honest, mother of two, these are the things I proudly identify with. What is not so easy to swallow is ADDICT, MENTAL HEALTH DISORDER and HUGE DEBT, and yet these are also part of me and my life. I need to learn to accept that, as lets face it they are not going anywhere in a hurry. I need to learn to accept the awful things I have done and what I’m capable of.
What did you do? You may be wondering. Quite frankly I took an almighty sized wrecking ball to my ‘perfect’ life in the form of an online gambling addiction. In this blog I hope to share my experiences, partly for me (perhaps it will have some therapeutic value and help me make sense of everything), but also for you. I believe that women don’t talk about addiction enough, and from my experience certainly not gambling. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist….it does, and with the increase of targeted gambling adverts everywhere I suspect it is something that is on the rise.
My blog shares my whole journey, the highs, the lows, rehab half way across the world, my diagnosis of bipolar, my terrifying debt. And whilst pretty grim in some places ultimately I hope this can be a story of hope. I don’t wish for this to be a pity party but this is a personal, honest reflection of someone who has lost herself and is determined to rebuild her life.
Mental illness, financial burdens and addiction have taken so much away from me. I’m ready to fight back…….I’m mum in recovery.
Please help me if you can
Be kind to yourself & take care x